The Star Robes Magic Show!
by Smak64
Summary: Inspired by The Aquabats Super Show!, which I do not own. Nor do I own The Legend of Zelda. Meant to be a little humorous oneshot, but I'm pretty tempted to continue this. It's a shame Wizzrobe isn't listed as a character, this story has four of them. And Link, but he's on the side. Enjoy it! Oh, and please review! I like getting those.


**Disclaimer**: I do not own The Legend of Zelda, or The Aquabats Super Show!, the latter of which this story was inspired by.

All of these characters, aside from Link, who is owned by Nintendo, are wizzrobes, who are also owned by Nintendo. But, seeing as they aren't given personalities, these ones have personalities inspired by the personas of the Aquabats, who are owned by themselves.

Also, I wasn't sure whether or not it should be put as a cross-over, so I left it as this.

* * *

"Okay everyone, here's the plan..." I said, leaning in close to my fellow mages and whispering. "Okay! Everyone got the plan?"

"Uh, not really, Archie..." Nincompoop said a little meekly, looking at me confused from under his hat.

"What is it Nincompoop? I thought my plan was perfect!"

"Well, that's the problem, Archmage..." Surge spoke up, cowering slightly when I tossed a glare his way. "You... didn't exactly give us a plan. You just kept saying 'pssst, psst, whisper, whisper' under your breath..."

"Well, it's your job as a proud member of our team to interpret our secret whispering as a functional plan that I actually meant! Our whispering is so our enemies can't learn the plan by listening really hard!"

"...Or you could just, you know, actually make a plan..." Snowflake said, rubbing his hands together to keep himself from freezing by his own magic.

"Well if you guys don't like my plan, why don't you come up with one?"

All of us stood there, looking around at each other confused. Except for me, I was being confident and determined in my glances.

"Don't look at me!" Our resident incompetent, Nincompoop, burst out when our gazes settled on him.

"C'mon, mages! We gotta do something about Link, or Lord Ganondorf will have our robes!"

"You're right, Snowflake! Now, if we stick to the plan, we'll have that Hero burning and freezing on the temple floor in his own, cold, enflamed blood!"

"...You know those contradict each other...?" Nincompoop muttered under his breath, looking at the floor before getting interrupted.

"Oi oi, what about me!?"

"Oh, Surge. Forgot about you. Yeah, you can sit there and think about all the wiring you can hook up when we get home. Electricity's useless underground, dummy." I said, chuckling at the end.

"That doesn't mean you just count me out! You're a mean guy, Archmage..." He says, pouting off into the distance.

"Anyhow, everyone get ready for the plan! Link'll be here any- OH MY GOD HE'S HERE!" I cry out, pointing at the locked door with bars over it. My entire team turns around to look at it in fear, Snowflake shivering as ice envelops his hands, Surge trying to get a charge but failing as it dives at the ground and fizzles out, and Nincompoop sitting there with his hands balled up under his chin, shuddering as I hear him beginning to cry.  
Only for the door to stay closed as I burst into laughter at them.

"W-What was that for, Archie!? You frightened us!" Nincompoop says, tears falling from the glowing eyes in the shadow of his hat.

"A training exercise, you dolt! I need to keep you guys on your toes in case he-OH GOD THAT ACTUALLY IS HIM!" I cry out, summoning a flame and backing away as the door on the opposite side of the room opens, bars sliding away as the Hero of Time steps through.

"Okay, okay! Everyone, stick to the plan!" I call out, sweating nervously.

"W-What plan!? All you did was say 'whisper whisper'!"

"Just... Just hit him with whatever you have!" I say, tossing a fireball at Link, which is easily reflected by his mirror shield, the flame flying off into the distance.

"I'll show you I've more tricks up my sleeve than static charges!" Surge cries out, tossing a bolt of electicity that quickly redirects to the ground, fizzling out as his shoulders droop and he backs away.

"M-Mr. Link! I-If you reflect this, p-please don't hit me with it! I get hypothermia easily!" Snowflake cries out, shivering as he tosses a ball of ice magic at the hero. The ball is quickly reflected by his shield, bouncing back towards us as we all cry out in surprise and pull Snowflake out of the way, the ball hitting against the door behind us and covering it in sleet.

"Guess that only leaves one of us... Our last hope..." I say under my breath, all of us turning to look at-

"Don't look at me!" Nincompoop cries out, holding his hands up in a shrug as a light breeze fills the room for an instant.

"...Well," I begin, turning to watch the hero slowly approach us. "Since it looks like we're all going to die here, anyone have anything they want to say?"

"I-I used to study Alchemy with the old lady in that witch hut!" Surge speaks up, brightening his mood a bit. "She was a really nice person when she was young, and was even pretty cute! She taught me how to make all kinds of healing potions!"

"Did she teach you how to make any kinds of dying potions...?" I ask hopefully.

"Well... no...?"

"...Snowflake?"

"I used to be the court mage for Hyrule Castle!"

We murmur a few good words and statements cheerfully as we look at eachother, turning to face him as I ask with a smile. "What happened to that?"

"W-Well... It was a cool day in winter, and I caught hypothermia... When my health wasn't getting much better, the apothecary said there was nothing she could do, and the king gave me a month's pay in condolences..."

"But... you're alive. Why didn't you re-apply?"

"I did, but... they already found a new guy, and were sorry to say they couldn't rehire me..."

"...Nincompoop?"

"W-Well, I-I..." He begins, a faint red glow appearing from where his cheeks would be in the darkness as he reaches up to pull his hat down to try and hide it. "I-I'm..."

We all look at him expectantly, confused by what amazing news could come from his mouth.

"I-I'm... I'm actually... g-gay. A-And I have a crush on V-Vaati!"

"...Why?" I ask, deadpanned at the news.

"W-Well, h-he's so cute, a-and so cuddly looking, a-and he's so good at wind magic..."

"...One mage to another," I begin, leaning close to him and saying quietly in his ear. "I think he's also too young for you."

"N-No, h-he just looks young because he likes that form... H-He's actually well into adulthood."

"...Well, if one of us survives this, we'll be sure to let him know that you liked him, and then we'll tell you how he reacted in the afterlife."

We keep cowering in fear, backing up as Link grows closer to us, until we're pressed up against the wall. I swallow my breath in fear of how close he is, able to make out the intricate carving on his blade.

"U-Uhm... Uhm..." Nincompoop begins, frantically searching for the words he's looking for as the hero turns to look at him, confused. "S-Say, M-Mr. H-Hero... I-If we g-gave you the b-boss k-key we're h-holding onto... C-Could you let us g-go...?" He asks, smiling nervously. Link moves his free hand to his chin, considering this.

"I-I'll throw in a r-red potion I have!" Snowflake speaks up, pulling a corked bottle of red liquid out of his robes. The hero turns to look at him, smiling at the offer and accepting the bottle as he sheathes his sword, pocketing it and the key handed to him by Nincompoop. The bars on the door behind us then raised, freeing the door as Link opened it, stepping through and closing it behind him.

"...Well, that negotiation certainly worked out in our favor!" I say, starting the hearty laughter as we're all soon having a merry round of cheery laughing at our escape of death. "Alright, now, we've got to get out of this temple. It's stuffy, and something smells like someone casted a yellow spell!"

"E-Er..." Nincompoop begins, his laughter subsiding. "T-That was me... I... peed myself since I was scared." All our laughter subsides at this comment, each of us clutching our noses and letting out noises of disgust.

"Well... We'll stop by the launder on the way home... Okay..." I finish with, clearing my throat. "Star Robes, let's go!" I say, running determinedly towards the exit of the temple as the rest of us cowardly run along the same path as me.

* * *

"What amazes me most about our adventures is that you fell for Vaati!" I say, chuckling with the others at that bit of Nincompoop's admittance.

"H-Hey!"

"What would it even be called? A 'Gale Romance'?" Snowflake says, causing all of us but our failure of a mage to laugh heartily.

"S-Stop it!"

"Ah, don't worry, Nincompoop. It's all fun and games..." I begin, smiling as I elbow him lightly in the arm. "Until someone's taking the rear entrance."

"S-Stop making fun of me!" Our youngest member cries out, blushing in embarrassment as we all laugh at him.


End file.
